Sunday, September 23, 2007

A Dream I Had-Draft One

I promise that everyone had a dream in their life, and I had a horrible dream many years ago. To begin with, I was appeared in an airplane, flying it smoothly. Nevertheless, many shrill screams given form the rooms behind me. I didn’t know what happened, so I tried to call the flight attendants, but no one answered me. Next, some strange people rushed in, and hijacking this airplane, I couldn’t resist them, owing to their guns. They wanted to control the airplane to hit the presidential palace because they wanted to copy the 911 incident. When we were above the presidential palace, the airplane fell quickly, and then broke. I think some news may influence me a lot in my daily life.

7 Comments:

Blogger Phoebe Lee said...

"I was appeared in an airplane"
↑不是被動吧

你醒來了嗎?!

6:46 AM  
Blogger candy said...

Next,用all of a sudden 似乎會比較有緊張的感覺

8:22 AM  
Blogger Fanny said...

That must be a very terrific dream.

3:28 AM  
Blogger Jenny said...

What a horrible it was! Thanks to it's just a dream.

4:10 AM  
Blogger 娜娜 said...

一開始就點破主題覺得夢很恐怖
但我覺得埋個伏筆較好
因為也許有人會因為你的標題
先有預設心裡覺得很恐怖
淡看完覺得還好
這樣就彰顯不出效果
所以你可以鋪陳多一點
讓大家更有身歷其境的感覺
(我覺得你描述的還不錯,但可再多一點點)
接著最後再說你覺得很恐怖
大家就會有那種感同身受的感覺

7:28 AM  
Blogger  said...

It's a terrible dream.What's the situation make you wake up?

7:43 AM  
Blogger 美萱 said...

When the airplane had broke, you woke up, right?
Maybe you can write more before the hijack occurred.

9:11 AM  

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